CHECK out this prickly little customer! It’s not a Chronicle reader! It’s a hedgehog.

It was spotted at dusk by keen-eyed photography enthusiast Gabriel Archan, who was out for a stroll on the Croesonen Park field last Saturday.

“I’d come out just to get away from the England game!” Explained Gabe.

“I haven’t got a problem with England. I just find Harry Kane annoying. He reminds me of Dan Dare and every time I see him on TV I feel my blood pressure rise slightly. So I thought it best if I went for a constitutional, and boy am I glad I did!”

Gabe added, “You see all sorts of things in Croesonen Parc at night, but I wasn’t expecting to bump into a hedgehog in such an open environment and on such a light evening.”

Gabe told the Chronicle that at first he thought the hedgehog was just a mound of dried grass.

“It was the same colour and from a distance it looked like it was made of the same stuff as the yellow and parched field.”He said.

Gabe added, “I was about to pretend I was Erling Haaland and kicking the penalty that would put England out of the World Cup, while the camera crew grabbed a close-up on Harry Kane’s broken and bewildered face, when an inner voice said, ‘Don’t be a bastard Gabe!’

“Usually I ignore such voices and just carry on regardless, but on this occasion something made me pause for a moment, and that’s all it took for me to realise the mound of grass I was about to boot in the stratosphere was an actual hedgehog.

“I could have wept! But I didn’t! I just took a picture for Insta. And after lying next to the hedgehog I told him my life story until it got dark.

“I never knew hedgehogs were such good listeners, and after blowing it a kiss goodbye I got up and walked home where the news of England’s win killed my good mood stone dead.”