THE disease of alcoholism is insidious. During a lifetime it slowly gnaws away and hollows out those who are caught in its grip. It ruins relationships, destroys trust, and leaves family and friends feeling hopeless and helpless as they watch loved ones slowly consumed by addiction.

An alcoholic doesn’t just destroy themselves. Their self-destruction has a terrible impact on anyone in their immediate orbit.

Wanting to help a loved one who won’t, for whatever reason, allow themselves to be helped has a corrosive and confusing effect, particularly on children.

At 50, Sophie Calon’s father was a high-flying lawyer. At 55, he was found dead in Cardiff city centre at Christmas. Meanwhile, he had pinballed between tents, homeless shelters, and prison cells.

Sophie’s debut book ‘Long Going’ is a raw and unflinching memoir of how alcoholism can consume a person - and a family.

Most of all it is a book written for other children of alcoholics to reassure them they are not alone.

An estimated 478,000 UK children live with a parent who is addicted to alcohol or drugs. Because they do not have the luxury of experience or perspective, children have a habit of normalising their home environment and family relationships, no matter how dysfunctional.

Sophie told the Chronicle that as a child she was aware that her dad was in the pub a lot and drank a bottle of wine in the evening. However, because he was a high-flying corporate lawyer and family man, and not the tired stereotype of a tramp drinking out of a paper bag from dawn to noon, it wasn’t considered an issue, until it was.

“In hindsight, Dad got by for years as a high-functioning alcoholic. He never seemed to suffer hangovers and always led a very active life, but sooner or later all that abuse catches up with an individual and they go downhill,” explained Sophie.

“It was when I went to university I noticed how bad he had become,” said Sophie.

“I’d call home and he’d often be drunk in the daytime and not making sense. And then he started a habit of getting arrested for being drunk and disorderly.

“He did try to get help and went to rehab but he’d always relapse and things went from bad to worse.

“Mum stayed with him as long as she could, but she finally reached breaking point, but like us all, she never stopped loving him. It’s just the despair of seeing someone you love destroy themselves becomes so overwhelming. The alcohol takes over and they almost fade from view.”

The ghosts that haunt us are often just questions that need answering and it’s Sophie's hope that ‘Long Going’ opens up a conversation.

She explained, “When I was young I never told my friends about dad’s drinking problem because I viewed it as a betrayal and that can leave you feeling quite isolated and confused.

“What I have learned from writing this book is that talking about Dad’s issues has brought me closer to him again. He was an alcoholic, but he was also my best friend.”

Long Going by Sophie Calon is available now.

Sophie will be doing a signing at Abergavenny’s Bookish on Friday, June 27 between 1-3 pm.